THE MAGICAL ARMCHAIR

The Ben Folds Five Digest

Issue #764 - January 16, 1998



Magical Armchair Digest    Friday, January 16 1998    Volume 01 : Number 764



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TOPICS IN THIS DIGEST:

    I want my Naked Baby Photos!
    Subject: Is that a PHONE RINGING?
    NBP release in Australia
    "Whatever" Rockets to #66 in Billboard!
    hey bf5 peeps. 
    philly show/9:30 club
    Re: Magical Armchair Unsubscribe
    ben's twin brother 
    brick on JJJ
    Well, I never! 
    Aussie News!
    German release date
    Squirrel rim...
    A Puritan Porn Star 
    Slash & Burn, Baby! 

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: Thu, 15 Jan 1998 20:38:06 EST
From: Roxygrrrl1 <Roxygrrrl1@aol.com>
Subject: I want my Naked Baby Photos!

Hey boys and girls ~
What's going on? Still haven't picked up my NBP - I've been sick all week.
This Saturday, it's mine! Well, that's what I'm hoping. If you are going to
the NYC show, e-mail me - maybe we can all hang out. 
I'm not going to yell and get mad about all the people posting about SNL. They
have a reason to bitch.
I never had a real pet, therefore, unfortunately, I don't get a porn star
name. Does a goldfish count as a pet?
Oh yeah, I found this at Rolling Stone Online 
<A HREF="aol://4344:1828.bf980115.15629800.569350910">Q&A - Ben Folds Five</A>
It's a decent interview and a good picture. Anyway, I must be going, love you
all ~
            
Fara

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 15 Jan 1998 21:09:54 +0000
From: "Phillip Yip" <pyip1@umbc.edu>
Subject: Subject: Is that a PHONE RINGING?

> Anyway, at EXACTLY 2:54 into track 9, right during a pause in the
> song, I
> HEAR A PHONE RINGING. It sounds like a cordless phone, maybe not, 
> but none the less, there is DEFINITELEY a phone ringing on that 
> track at 2:54. 

Hehe.. I noticed that too.. I've confused it for an actual phone a 
couple of times and run to the phone only to realize it was the song.

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 16 Jan 1998 12:38:35 CST 
From: "Petra Starke" <naturalselection@hotmail.com>
Subject: NBP release in Australia

Heyo girls and boys! 

Just heard Brick AGAIN on the radio - that's twice in two days, and both 
times played by Michael Tunn (alias Tunny) - does this mean he is a fan? 
Updates to follow... (cos it's such an interesting topic of 
conversation)(only after topics like the infamous 'one song' SNL 
appearance or the experience of buying NBP, of course, which are both 
highly stimulating areas of conversation).

And on THAT topic, might I mention that Tunny, in his Brick back anounce 
said:

"That was Brick, the new single from Ben Folds Five *[apparently no one 
has noticed that it has been out for quite some time]* from their last 
album. There's also a new album of rarities due to come out in a couple 
of months."

Must we wait this long, or does Tunny just have no idea about anything? 
The latter is fairly likely.

Cheers,

Petra

PS: I don't care, I have it on tape!

"Even old New York was once New Amsterdam. Why they changed it, I can't 
say; people just liked it better that way," - TMBG

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------------------------------

Date: Thu, 15 Jan 1998 20:25:56 -0600
From: quinnt@scc.net
Subject: "Whatever" Rockets to #66 in Billboard!

(note:  if this post doesn't go out 'til Friday night, pardon me for dishing out what might be old news by then.)

         ***WAEA Chart-Vaults Again!***

Yes, it's true.  WAEA leaps 28 positions within the top 100 of Billboard album charts, from 94 to 66, and blows away its own previous peak of 90.  This is actually the first chart week that would reflect any impact from the SNL appearance.  Apparently, ei

ther most SNL viewers did not in fact think Ben was about to blow chunks (as was speculated here on the 'Chair), or else they did - but found it strangely compelling!  Or maybe the album's selling for other reasons.  I'm trying to picture Ben walking arou

nd in his own $20 million mansion wearing his usual J.C. Penney clothes.

Some Armchairites might feel enlightened to know that the reason BFF have a "contractual obligation" album with Caroline at this point is simply because there was a load of major-label interest in signing BFF away from Caroline, so Caroline took advantage

 of that fact and asked for a few extra goodies...including the right to release an album of "leftovers".  You notice they also managed to get their own logo printed on the back of WAEA - which really doesn't make sense, and yet, strangely, there it is.  

And they also got a big suitcase full of money and the chance to appear in some future BFF video.  

I'm not sure about the video part.  That could've just been a rumor.  

Elsewhere:

In issue #745, rICH writes:
> 5) Janet Jackson swiped a vocal melody from me on her new album. And
> Marcy Playground snatched an entire chord progression (Bm/ A/ G/ D, on
> "You Have No Idea," for the record). Except, of course, for the fact
> that neither of these artists have ever heard ANYTHING I've ever written.

Maybe not, rICH, but I bet both you and Ms. Playground have heard Tracy Chapman's "Fast Cars".  That chord sequence you printed is from "Fast Cars".  

Oh, another thing from Billboard:  Steve Miller is gearing up for the launch of his "Space Cowboy Tour '98".  I swear.  

~El L.

"And I'll root toot shoot myself to fame/
 Every kid alive gonna know my name/
 An overnight phenomenon like there's never been/
 A motivated, supersonic king of the scene/

 I'll be a teenage idol/...
 I'm gonna grab myself a place in history"  ~Elton John/Taupin

"...You take this all for granted/
 You take the mortar, block and glass/
 And you forget the speech that moved the stone/..."  

	~Ben Folds.  He always knew, you know.

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 15 Jan 1998 21:23:29, -0500
From: PFJH05D@prodigy.com (MISS JESSICA R BORASH)
Subject: hey bf5 peeps. 

i only put a few of these things up, so whatever.  i hope whoever 
owns naked baby photos loves it, because that cd is soon to come my 
way.  also, i wanted to tell all you who have AOL that i have an AOL 
screen name because i have the instant messenger.  so if any of you 
want to add me to your buddy list and talk bf5 with me, my name is
bf5chick
okay?  
always in character, "bianca"

"and she speaks and she breathes" -ben folds, my man.

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 15 Jan 1998 21:46:23 -0500
From: joel <toolophile@psu.edu>
Subject: philly show/9:30 club

anyone know when the feb 21, 22 shows go on sale?

~joel

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 15 Jan 1998 21:09:52 -0500
From: susan parker <parker62@mindspring.com>
Subject: Re: Magical Armchair Unsubscribe

Please unsubscribe us from your e-mail list.  We would really appreciate it!  

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 15 Jan 1998 23:27:41 -0500 (EST)
From: bobafett@ekx.infi.net
Subject: ben's twin brother 

hey guys....
        its been sooooo long since i have had anything to say, but here
lately, it seems like everyone else has contributed, so hey...why not.
        i discovered something interesting...i work in a shop in the theatre
in louisville, ky and my shop foreman (mikey) looks exactly like ben
folds...its frightening.  in fact, a girl picked up nbp and thought that it
really was mikey on the front and exclaimed that she never knew that mikey
was in a band.  silly silly girl.  of course, mikey does not believe he
looks a thing like him, so as a joke...a friend and i blew up a pic of mikey
and put a blown up pic (that i took) of ben and put them side by side...he
should see the pair tomorrow.  tee hee.
        to the person who said darren looks like mark of morphine...i was
the person who agreed with you this summer....i still do.  i saw a picture
of morphine the other day and couldn't get over how much they look
alike...even with mark hittin' the hard stuff.  
        one last thing...is anyone on this list from KENTUCKY???  Namely
LOUISVILLE????  I would love to know.
        jessica
ps.  my 9 month old kitten/cat is named emaline...and i am so glad to
finally have a recorded version of that song.

Jessica B. Musselwhite  
bobafett@ekx.infi.net OR
jbmuss01@homer.louisville.edu

  
"But now I have changed my mind...or the girl who said 'no'-she doesn't
exist anymore, she died last summer- suffocated in smoke from something on
fire inside her.  No she doesn't live now, but she left me her ring...And
she said to me when she slipped this ring on my finger-'Remember I died
empty-handed, and so make sure your hands have something in them.'  I said,
'But what about pride?'- She said 'Forget about pride when it stands between
you and what you must have!'  And then I said 'But what if he doesn't want
me?' I don't know what she said then- I'm not sure whether she said anything
or not- her lips stopped moving...yes, I think she stopped breathing..."
Alma, from Tennessee Williams' Summer and Smoke

------------------------------

Date: Thu, 15 Jan 1998 20:35:24 -0700
From: "Julie Hurst" <sledgie@mailexcite.com>
Subject: brick on JJJ

So I was coming back from my holiday on the train and I was listening to my walkman
and I was listening to WAEA and I turned it to triple j and Everclear was on so I
listened to it and then tunny said before that you heard ben folds five with their
new single brick and then he said about naked baby photos and said that it will be
out in a couple of months, that has to be a mistake though, right?? In a alt newspaper
I got in Melbourne had the top ten albums on RRR and no. 10 was naked baby photos!
I'm confused, I went into every store in the city and none knew!! Does anyone know???



Free web-based email, Forever, From anywhere!
http://www.mailexcite.com

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 16 Jan 1998 00:20:26 -0800
From: brad crum <bcrum1@ix.netcom.com>
Subject: Well, I never! 

In armchair #758, the wise and slow-to-anger Michigan Joe... 
(I mean, how can you yell at a guy named "Michigan Joe...i askya.)
...pointed out the fact that attitude and incivility is creeping back 
into the Armchair (actually, I'd say it's not just creepin', it's pretty 
much rollin' right on in with the tide...)  

It's not that we're seeing the downright flamings of months past,  it's 
just all the macho posturing--and arguing, usually about weighty topics 
like EXACTLY how many bands have played three songs on SNL over the past 
20 years. 

In his posting, Michigan Joe said: (diplomatically omitting the name of 
the offender(s))  Here is an example of a non-democratic, "I'm more 
special and intelligent than you" post....

>>SHUT THE F*UCK UP ABOUT SAT NITE LIVE!!!!!!!  GET OVER IT!
>>Secondly...I would consider myself a  friend of the boys and (yadda, yadda, yadda...etc.)

OK..the yadda yaddas are mine--but that's a real dandy isn't it?
(I mean, who cares whether the writer is a friend of Ben's or not--and 
how could he prove it anyway?!) 

Then M. Joe pointed out something that couldn't be truer: 

"As annoying as it might be to some, every single person on this list 
hasthe right to talk about BF5 on SNL. I'm glad not everyone did but if 
they had, well that's their right. Certainly talking about BF5 on the 
BF5 listis allowed no matter how repetitive it might be.No, this is not 
an attack, this is a plea for civility......PLEASE."

I told you Joe was diplomatic.  

I, on the other hand will finish with a slightly edgier plea:  If you're 
on the Armchair to beat your chest about how cool you are and how much 
you know--there have got to be some thrash metal sites where you'd fit 
right in with all the guitar gods.  

By now you should have noticed that we strive for a little higher  level 
of discourse here. We're more focused on Ben, the guys and their music, 
than in blowing our own horns.  

Our love of BFF is supposed to be pulling us all together. Let's not let 
crudity and ego ruin a great site. 

Brad C

"The girls don't understand it...all you do and say,
I don't understand it either; guess that makes me gay"
- --Ben Folds

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 16 Jan 1998 01:47:04 -0800 (PST)
From: Jodie Poole <jodiepoole@yahoo.com>
Subject: Aussie News!

Hi everyone,

  Well, finally I heard Brick on Triple J for the first time since it
was released here in Australia.  'Bout bloody time don't you
reckon?!?!  Hopefully we'll be  hearing heaps more of it, like all you
guys in the US.

And for those of y'all that wanted to know the release date for NBP
over here, its definately being released in Perth on Monday (20th
Jan).  So I'd say it'd be the same over east as well.

Catcha!
Jodie


==
         _--_|\
        /      \
Perth=> *_.--._/
              v

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------------------------------

Date: Fri, 16 Jan 1998 13:42:53 MEZ-1MESZ
From: "REIFFERT CHRISTOPH FB07" <reiffert@hrz2.uni-oldenburg.de>
Subject: German release date

Hello fellow Armchairs,

don't know whether every German on the list knows about the release date 
of NBP. I asked in a shop and they told me that it's Monday, 19th January.

Bye,

Chris



I've got my philosophy.
                       (Ben Folds Five)

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 16 Jan 1998 06:38:15 -0600
From: "Scott A. Schneider" <echo@msn.globaldialog.com>
Subject: Squirrel rim...

> Hmm..I seem to be posting here a lot lately. Oh well...I just had one
> question. "Bad Idea" demo version....when they sing " I think I see some
sweet
> squirrel rim.." what is squirrel rim? Are we talking like intestines and
> whatnot?

"Sweet score women", I believe.

scott

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 16 Jan 1998 08:52:37 -0500 (EST)
From: "Carolyn G." <carolynG@divmkt.tiac.net>
Subject: A Puritan Porn Star 

Hey, I always hear that phone ring and It scares me everytime. I always go
to pick up the phone and no one is there!!!!!!!!
TRICKY TRICKY!!!!
Hey, Craig, are you from Wellesley? You put in a post "GO Wellesley"
I live in Kingston, but my best friends live in Wellesley (They go to St.
Sebatians and Newton Country Day of the Sacred Heart.
I was upset by the Boston Phoenix :( GGRRRRRRRR
My drag queen name would be Patches Cobbett
and my porn name would be Anne Briarwood  (woah!!!! a Puritan Porn Star)
Desnudo Bebe Photos!!!!! YAY. I like it. AWESOME GUYS :)
~Elisabeth and I go to the same school (Archbishop Williams in Braintree)
and there is this Piano boy genius who goes there. He's in a few of our
classes (and on the swim team with me) WE HAVE TO INTRODUCE HIM TO OUR
FRIENDS (BFF)
Don't you think he would enjoy them?!?!?! I do. Some one who will appreciate
good music when they hear it, un like all the Archie punks at school who
carve Wu-Tang signs into the desks. 
BEASTIE BOYS RULE!!!!!!!
Fannie Packs makes me happy :)  I love Ben Folds Five with all my heart.
AAHHHH! It is full with passion for them!!!!! (cheesy but I just wanna
scream how awesome they are to the whole wide world.)
saw Titanic last night :( sad!!!!!

*CAROLYN*
*CAROLYN*
*CAROLYN*

P.S. Any body know what Ben Darre
should make some up :)

"Satan is my master"-Ben Folds

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 16 Jan 1998 10:30:28 -0500
From: Anne Lyons <westlyon@ma.ultranet.com>
Subject: Slash & Burn, Baby! 

Hello the 'Chair!

Well, after a long absence I have something* to write about again. I
finally got the chance to pick up NBP at the local Newbury Comics. While in
the store, my ears were blasted by the Spice Girls singing Spiceworld
(which I thought was odd, condisidering that NC is pretty much an
alterna-store). What was even weirder, was that the guy behind the counter
(who had a nose ring that was attached to an ear cuff by a long silver
chain and who was wearing black eyeliner) was getting his groove on to the
song. Actually, I found myself getting down as well... there is just a
KC-and-the-Sunshing-Band-type-of-infectiousness to that song. But I digress.

NBP rocks me right down to a nub! One question, though... does Ultimate
Sacrifice remind anyone else of Dana Carvey's "what I really want to be is
a musician" act that was on the Comedy Channel last year? Especially the
part where he's playing the keyboard and singing "She was chopping
broccoli" over and over? Anyway, both are hysterical.

So, here I am at school (where I work) but there is no school today due to
a snowstorm, so I am happily working away with NBP blaring on my computer
(no, the sound quality is not great, but it is better than nothing!)

Here are some nuggets of wisdom for you all to ponder, heedlessly lifted
from http://www.cs.virginia.edu/~robins/quotes.html

"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
- - Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

"640K ought to be enough for anybody."
- - Bill Gates, in 1981

Signing off for now...

- -Anne

*Well, I have been having a recurring dream in which Robert appears to be
floating above my head while I swing on a playground swingset. Rob is
wearing  an orange prison suit and he continually tells me that the world
is will end in a fireball on May 14, 2013, and that I should begin canning
vegetables. But I'm pretty sure that isn't of much interest to anyone here.
Unless you want to go in with me for the fireproof bomb shelter I'm
building in my backyard?

------------------------------

End of Magical Armchair Digest V1 #764
**************************************


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