THE MAGICAL ARMCHAIR

The Ben Folds Five Digest

Issue #810 - February 7, 1998



Magical Armchair Digest   Saturday, February 7 1998   Volume 01 : Number 810



                          THE MAGICAL ARMCHAIR
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DO NOT REPLY TO OFF-TOPIC OR INSULTING MESSAGES!!!
   So many people are complaining about how much space these useless
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problem by quoting or replying to these messages themselves.
   Posts with no BFF content are off topic. So are posts of a moderating
nature (that's my job). Usually I will send a gentle reminder to
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and on. As a result, please be aware that you may find yourself
unsubscribed without warning if you post an off-topic message.

BACK ON SCHEDULE
   The problem has been fixed and digests should once again be going out
daily on schedule.

TOPICS IN THIS DIGEST:

    UNSUBSCRIBE
    Video Killed the BFF Star / Marcy Playground
    The Class System
    Attn: DAT tapers & traders
    Robert's New Fluvogs!
    lovelines nightmare                   
    CMJ & BF's inspiration
    stuff
    TOURNAMENT RESULTS!!!
    Would the real Walter please stand up?
    sonic host
    conformity
    Personal thanks to Robert Sledge (Seattle)
    Opening band in Seattle
    nacy, tonya, and ben folds five?
    Ben Folds as Cornholio
    Susan Park is awesome....
    Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #805
    Uncle Plastic Bogus?/"Chumps"/"...For Sissies"

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 03:15:12 EST
From: WheelClay@aol.com
Subject: UNSUBSCRIBE

Unsubscribe! please.

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 06 Feb 1998 05:33:55 -0700
From: EtKreitzer@vassar.edu (Ethan Jon Kreitzer)
Subject: Video Killed the BFF Star / Marcy Playground

Someone asked about BFF's version of Video Killed the Radio Star, and the
popularity of the Presidents of the United States version-- and if BFF"s
version could've matched that popularity. Well, according to Mr. Folds,
they left that cover off of Naked Baby Photos out of fear that Caroline
would push for that as the single and putting them in jeopardyof being
known best for covering an 80's one-hit wonder song. (Apparently it didn't
do much for the Presidents of the United States as they are calling it
quits.) Anyways BFF's version is pretty killer and always brought out great
reactions from the crowds as the encore of almost all of their pre-Whatever
and Ever Amen shows in the states. 

On another note, the reason the old song Sex and Candy by Marcy Playground
is only lately catching on, is because they were on EMI Records which
folded and are now on Capital Records. A testament to the fact that major
label budgets can use their expenses to get any piece of shit on the radio
or MTV, yet you generally have to be pretty amazing to become popular off a
smaller label. Ethan Jon Kreitzer

- ---------
The sugar coated pill is getting bitterer still
YOU THINK YOUR COUNTRY NEEDS YOU BUT YOU KNOW IT NEVER WILL
So pack up your troubles in a stolen handbag
DON'T DILLY DALLY BOYS RALLY ROUND THE FLAG--

                                                        declan macmanus
                                                                        

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 04:23:20 -0800 (PST)
From: Amanda J <audeshii@yahoo.com>
Subject: The Class System

When I first saw the system I thought. Good idea. And it was just
that, and idea. Not an actual implementation. 

So why do don't all just leave it as an idea? Why does there have to
be in each edition of the Armchair people agreeing ro disagreeing on
the issue?

Audeshii



_________________________________________________________
DO YOU YAHOO!?
Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 08:09:10 -0500 (EST)
From: Alexander Timin <ajt2911@garnet.acns.fsu.edu>
Subject: Attn: DAT tapers & traders

If you would like your BFF DAT tapes transferred to cd-r, I will do it for
free.  Email me privately.

Alex Timin
ajt2911@garnet.acns.fsu.edu

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 05:52:39 -0800 (PST)
From: selfless cold and composed <sullenmoon@rocketmail.com>
Subject: Robert's New Fluvogs!

Well, Hi all! I've just gotten back in from the Seattle show, and I
thought I'd post a few thoughts on the subject. Firsst off, I've been
lurking for a while, but this is my first post. I've been a fan for a
year or so now, and last night was my first show.
I loved it. They are fantastic on stage. Ben made the statement
several times that Robert had just bought a new pair of John Fluvogs
here in town. Must've been talking about tham all day..... I got there
a little late, not too late to snatch several posters off of the
walls, but too late to get a decent place on the floor. So, I grabbed
some stools and made camp in the very back against the wall. Had a
perfect view almost the whole time, though I wish I would've been
closer. During SFTD, someone threw a "black t-shirt" on stage. Ben
would later jump up on the piano and strip for us (yee-haw!). He took
off his shirt and put on the one someone threw. Was it someone on the
list? Anyway, the guys were in good form, lots of energy. We were
lucky to get a show during the first part of the tour, before they got
all tired and sick of it.
I thought the club it was held at sucked. The sound sucked, and their
levels seemed really screwed up during a lot of it. 
This is getting kinda long, so I'll say so long for now. 
So who else was there? Why don't you send me an (private) e-mail and
we can discuss it!
~Jennifer
(that was me sitting on the back wall,by the bathrooms, against the
mirrors, with my boyfriend and my sister)



===

          Jennifer Morton    Sullenmoon@Rocketmail.com
SullenMoon's Jamiroquai Page! 
My NEW Homepage! http://members.tripod.com/~SullenMoon/index.html
 " I could never sleep my way to the top, 'cause my alarm-clock always
wakes me right up...-TMBG 






_________________________________________________________
DO YOU YAHOO!?
Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 98 9:00:16 EST
From: "Emily Durand" <edurand@nunet.neu.edu>
Subject: lovelines nightmare                   

I turned on the radio in my car Wed. night, and there was Ben on Lovelines 
(on 101.7 in Boston).  Now, I admit I never listen to this show, so maybe it 
has some redeeming quality I just missed as a first-time listener, but I 
thought it was lame and awful.  I caught the woman who called in about, of 
course, "What's 'Brick' about?"  Well, I wanted to kick the DJ in the neck, 
he was a complete fool: "Wow, like, how did you know the song was about an 
abortion?  Do you see abortion in a lot of songs?  Have you had an abortion?" 
ARRRRGGGHHHH!!!  I was glad to hear Ben's inside scoop on the writing of it, 
but then I had to turn it off to avoid further torment.  Just my $0.02.
                                                      	Emily (UPB baby!!!)
"THe road's no place to raise a family." --- Ben Folds

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 06 Feb 1998 09:59:22 -0500
From: Brendan Noone <bnoone@junosystems.com>
Subject: CMJ & BF's inspiration

declan macmanus kicks ass!!!

Ben was quoted in the CMJ article citing that E.C. was one of his main
influences growing up.   Now I would love to see those guys write together.
 Forget about Burt Bacharach & the Walrus: Imagine what one angry Brit &
some of Ben's southern cooking would do to the music scene.   The King of
America and The Angry Dwarf  kick!!!

Later 
B
 

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 06 Feb 1998 10:28:56 -0500 (EST)
From: SLAYBAMJ@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu
Subject: stuff

Hey it's SLAy here with a couple of comments.
First of all. Someone was talking about the Fair Disco Remix. You say it has
Strings?Is it the same version they were playing on the HORDE tour? When they
played
Fair in Coulumbus, they went into the bridge and Darren played a definite Disco
beat while the strings filled in with a disco "feel." It was very different and
I actually preferred it to the original Fair. So, in that case, should I get
the Disco mix? Does anyone know anyuthing about this.

Also, to the guy at the campus station writing about CMJ...
When I worked at a College station a couple years ago, we were getting CMJ, but
it was always a different version then appeared on the newsstand or that a
regular subscriber woiuld get. I don't know if that's still the case since they
re-vamped it, but that might be an explanation.  
SLAY

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 06 Feb 1998 10:40:41 -0500 (EST)
From: SLAYBAMJ@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu
Subject: TOURNAMENT RESULTS!!!

And now it's time for another round of Kick the Crap Outta That Song!!!

Hello folk. Thanx again to all who voted. If you were a judge and didn't get a
ballot, it's bacuase I tried and it didn't get through for some God-awful I
reason. I apologize I always tried twice, so please keep your mailboxes
not-to-full and if I missed you in the last round, e-mail me again and I'll
pick you up for this one. Okay? Thank you thank you thank you...
And now, this round's match-ups...

In Bracket A...
Best Imitation vs Jackson Cannery
Evaporated vs Philosophy
Battle of Who Could Care Less recieves a by after its exhausting fight with
that bitch Kate.
 In Bracket B...
Underground vs Last Polka
Alice Childrss vs Stephen's Last Night
Missing the War vs Emaline

And now ladies and gentlemen...Your winners...
Best Imitation of Myself  (An upset?!?!?!)
Philosophy (Another decisive victory!)
The Last Polka (Another upset!?!?!)
Alice Childress (Speak softly but carry a big stick.)
Emaline (Another victory by the unreleased monster!!!)

So...the next round will soon be on it's way. It's sure to be close folks, o if
you haven't registered as a judge, you'll want to e-mail me. Remember the fates
of these songs are in YOUR HANDS!!!! Only 2 rounds left!!!!
AAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
SLAY
slaybamj@miavx1.acs.muohio.edu

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 11:43:45 -0500 (EST)
From: Craig Michael Haen <cmh219@is8.nyu.edu>
Subject: Would the real Walter please stand up?

When I saw BFF in London last year, Ben introduced the song Uncle Walter
by saying it was about being left alone in a room with his friend's
mom...So, no, I really don't think it's about Walter Cronkite.
Interesting thought, though.

Craig

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 11:48:04 EST
From: Rocketno8@aol.com
Subject: sonic host

i feel stupid debating this dumb class system that many protest but all
embrace, but anyway: a lot of people are calling themselves whippers and UPBs
and then ask about how to find import singles..the whole point of being a UPB
is that you know and have everything there is. i make no bones about being an
Emaline because even though i'm probably the biggest BF5 in the state of
Delaware, i know there is much i don't have.

about CMJ: there are two versions of CMJ a monthly newsstand/subscription
version, which is the one with BF5 on the cover. then there is the industry
version that is sent to radio stations and other industry type people every
two weeks, which does not have BF5 on the cover. i hope i cleared up any
confusion. i'm going to Baltimore this weekend and i know a store that carries
CMJ, so i'll probably have it myself soon.
dr.rocket
Ben:"don't lean on the piano"
Robert:"what, you can dive into the piano and i can't touch it?"
Ben:"i don't dive into that piano, i dive into the other piano."

------------------------------

Date: Sat, 7 Feb 1998 01:51:14 +0700
From: "Laurie " <laurie@loxinfo.co.th>
Subject: conformity

Hello fellow BFF fans.  I just joined the list only to hear it need conform
to a category.  I can't believe it.  I would bet that 99% of you consider
yourselves nonconformists to some extent and 99% of you are buying into
that silly name.  I'm sure many of you think "it's funny, it's cool" 
Whatever.  I think it is a juvenile need to conform.  Grow up and get over
it.  I thought I would subscribe to this list to hear insightful comments
on this group that I just found out about.  I don't own a TV and don't
listen to the radio much because I live in Thailand.  I had never heard of
Brick until I bought the CD on a recommendation from a friend.  Just
because I'm new to knowing the group doesn't mean I'm some 15 year old who
heard Brick on the radio and now is desperately in love with the group.  So
what?  I have to be classified a "Brickhead" even though the term really
does not fit my situation  at all?  This classification thing is simply a
way of making yourself feel really good because you are a "better" fan than
someone else.  Please.  Aren't there better things to spend your time and
energy on?  

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 06 Feb 1998 11:23:09 -0800
From: Susan Park <maven@jetcity.com>
Subject: Personal thanks to Robert Sledge (Seattle)

Hopefully this message will get forwarded:

Robert, I'm the one who ran into you outside the door to DV8 and asked you to tell Ben his old school chum 
(the one you met at Moe's 2 years ago) was there to say hello. No, that wasn't me that answered "hey" in 
the audience when you looked for me. I was actually right under the piano, but I'm sure my face looked 
pretty dark in the crowd.

I really appreciate you attempting to tell Ben I was there and dedicate "Underground"  (actually happened 
to be my favorite BF5 song, until I got the latest album. Now Fanny Packs & Emaline are my favorites).

I don't blame you for temporarily forgetting. There were so many excited fans running around to meet you 
guys.

I'm just really happy the concert was such an incredible success and hope y'all come back often. I also 
hope you play more all-ages shows for the great people in other parts of WA State such as Spokane, 
Bremerton, & Walla Walla. 

By the way, the performance was more than excellent. The creative innovations and techniques you have 
all developed over the course of the long months being on the road have made your band really stand out. 
Seeing your band perform is like seeing all of the true great musician innovators together on one big 
stage. And the harmonizing was super-tight. You have no where to go but up!

Thanks again,
Susan

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 06 Feb 1998 11:29:57 -0800
From: Susan Park <maven@jetcity.com>
Subject: Opening band in Seattle

Any info on the Robbie Fulks (sp?) band who opened for BF5 in Seattle? 
They say they are from N.C. Who are they? They were pretty good! I 
especially loved: "North Carolina is the Cigarette State," the "Statesville" 
song, and "She Took Two Pills and Died!"

The CDs were for sale, but they either packed up and left early or sold out. 
By the end of the show, they were all gone.

- -spark

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 15:28:03 EST
From: Fretbored7@aol.com
Subject: nacy, tonya, and ben folds five?

alright, i admit, i watched the fox "women of 94 revisited" tonya and nancy
face to face shindig last night.  and gee, am i glad i did.  as the wholesome
and pure skaters such as nancy and that oksana skated in a packed arena in
vail... the camera suddenly cut to a pond where tonya was skating to a crowd
of about, oh, maybe 2 or three people.  anyway, i digress.  the music playing
while tonya skated?  none other than selfless, cold and composed by good ole
ben folds five.  i just thought it was kind of humorous.
oh, and i had a bff dream, but i won't get detailed... all i'll say is that i
was similar to drew barrymore in scream... and the killer was quizzing me not
on horror movies, but on ben folds five trivia... it was kind of a scary
dream.  luckily, i woke up.

it's not so bad being trendy,
*jackie*

"no matter how much it wants to, force can NEVER equal speed." ~my wonderful
physics teacher

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 16:36:59 EST
From: ShaLaLoLi@aol.com
Subject: Ben Folds as Cornholio

Please excuse me for being slow, but what is up with the picture on the back
of NBP?  Is that Cornholio, or something?  Ya know, beavis.  "I am BENHOLIO!"

Take care y'all....

Caroline

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 13:37:29 -0800 (PST)
From: Baldy Spice <wallmr@whitman.edu>
Subject: Susan Park is awesome....

I just needed to say, on behalf of all of us who went, or tried to go to
Seattle (I made it, it was the best concert of my life (that I wasn't a
part of...) that Susan Park is incredibly awesome! She's been a major help
organizing things and helping with all the difficulties. So, if I may, a
round of applause... <clap clap clap clap, etc., etc.>
					Love to all of You Crazies,
					  Max

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 06 Feb 1998 17:16:12 -0500
From: Mike Wilkinson <mwzoso@neo.lrun.com>
Subject: Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #805

>I just got NBP, and living in Idaho, love Twin Falls. Did Ben or anyone 
>else in the band live in Twin Falls or what?

actually Twin Falls is not a BFF song, its a cover of a Built to Spill
song.  (And I believe that Doug Martsch, who wrote the song, is from Idaho.
 I'm not sure if he's from Twin Falls though.)  By the way check out the Cd
its from, "There's Nothing Wrong With Love", or any of their CD's.  They're
pretty cool.

------------------------------

Date: Fri, 6 Feb 1998 17:27:12 -0600
From: quinnt@scc.net
Subject: Uncle Plastic Bogus?/"Chumps"/"...For Sissies"

The phrase Uncle Plastic Bee-otch seems to be in heavy rotation on the Armchair lately - does anyone know where it originated?  All I know is that it appeared in a Whatever ad in an alternative mag or two last spring - and I also heard a rumor that the ba
nd didn't necessarily OK its usage in the ads and possibly, perhaps weren't 110% jazzed about it.  Mind you, I have a special gift for understatement which I'm able to employ at will.  
_ __ ____ ______ ________ ______ ____ __ _

>From: Ginger Nance <gnance@email.unc.edu>
>Subject: irony and class struggles
>...
>Emaline.  Cool.  Whoever wrote "Song for [the] Chumps," you are a *&^%$%!
>That was freakin' %*&?%+#&*.  I love how people on this list complain

Yeah Ginger?  Well, same to you!  And you, Lucy!  All of you!

If "Song For The Chumps" is your kind of - you know - *thing*, and you missed the peculiar, seasonal manglement of "Brick" in December, it's at:
http://oeonline.com/bff/list/9712/bffdig.711.html  (subject: Santa, Baby)
Oh, go on...read the whole issue while you're there.  
"Reading is enrichment"
_ __ ____ ______ ________ ______ ____ __ _

>Just wanted to let everyone know there is a pretty good (and long)
>article ("Punk Rock for Sissies") about Ben Folds Five in 'Genre' - a
>gay magazine.  I definitely recommend it (the article).

Just an article?  No interview?  I wonder if they tried to get one.

Remember, groovy cats:  When you're standing around reading this thing in your local neighborhood magazine shop, be sure to casually tell everyone passing by that you're "just reading it for this one rock band article".  
_ __ ____ ______ ________ ______ ____ __ _

>At the end of SFTD, Ben says, "WE'RE the Spice Girls, we'll be back in March"
>It was Ben's attempt at being humorous to the English crowd.  Apparently, he
>handed out toothbrushes and deodorant to the London crowd, but they didn't
>like get it or something?
>Shiteboy

No shite?  Yeah, I think Ben just picks these things up in hotel bathrooms, then gives 'em out at the shows.  Me, I always go for those "sanitized for your protection" toilet strips.  I wear them at social functions.
 
~El L.
Gender: M  (I think someone wondered.  Thanks just the same for the tips on lipstick and pantyhose.)


      thank God it's you, you know your tie, Ming, is impeccable

------------------------------

End of Magical Armchair Digest V1 #810
**************************************


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