THE MAGICAL ARMCHAIR
The Ben Folds Five Digest
Issue #985 - May 9, 1998
Magical Armchair Digest Saturday, May 9 1998 Volume 01 : Number 985
THE MAGICAL ARMCHAIR
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TOPICS IN THIS DIGEST:
hello everyone!
Bunch of things...
Spin, Spin, Spin...:The Media Backlash begins
Pay for tapes? yeah right!
Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #979
Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #984
Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #983
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Thu, 07 May 1998 17:31:46 PDT
From: "Jessica Kinsaul" <icebox_6@hotmail.com>
Subject: hello everyone!
I'm new to this mailing list, so HELLO!!
I just got the greatest news yesterday! Ben Folds Five is coming to
Atlanta on June 14th!! It was announced yesterday around 7 P.M. on the
radio. The D.J. had a long interview w/ Ben. It was really cool, except
the D.j. kept calling him; "Ben Folds Five" and not Ben.. GRR!
that's all for now!
- -Jessica
"She said; 'You've been pushing me like I was a sore tooth,
you can't respect me 'cuz I've done so much for you.' He
said; 'Well, I hate that it's come to this, but baby I've
been doin' fine how do you think that I survived the other
25 before you?'"
______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 21:13:43 -0400
From: "John Felten" <Sammy7@gte.net>
Subject: Bunch of things...
First off, I was browsing in a music store today for "Brick" singles, and
guess what I come upon! I look in the B section, and what do I see?
"Basking In The Sun". I had to make sure it was The "Brick" remix. So I
turned the cover over and saw all the "Brick" mixes, and my stomach
turned...... I love it how they can turn a sad ballad like that about an
abortion, into a dance remix!
Also, I scored two mags today featuring BFF. I got the new "Spin" mag,
with a degrading article about "Brick". You know, it's great, that editor
has no idea what the hell he's talking about.
Finally, I got the "Riot Scene" mag. An armchairer the other day, said
there was an unflattering pic of Ben in it, actually I don't think it's
half bad, and I kinda dig it. But the pic of the three of them is great.
~Marie
Page For The Dumped
http://www.angelfire.com/fl/BenFolds5/index.html
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 21:58:37 EDT
From: HndOfChaos <HndOfChaos@aol.com>
Subject: Spin, Spin, Spin...:The Media Backlash begins
Hey all------
I know that this has already been mentioned.
Got my June 1998 Spin Magazine in the mail today.
Happened to open it up to page 136. Read pretty nice review of "Brick" by
Charles Aaron in the Singles section. Smiled at his hidden gushing:
Ben Folds Five
"Brick" (Sony 550)
Not a single per se, but a "Modern Rock Track" that's on pop radio, this piano
ballad wears its brooding, choked heart on its sleeve with more melodic depth
and poetry than 35 Grammy-nominated Babyface "compositions." Folds sings his
story of a drunk [huh?] guy and a lonely girl and an unwanted baby makes three
with fatigued restraint, never forcing his voice to straining for cheap
sympathy. Heard in rainy gridlock on I-85 outside Greenville, South
Carolina, while driving home for Christmas, it's a killer.
Then I saw page 137. Grimaced and clenched teeth at the picture of the boys.
VERY BAD PICTURE of the band. Got mad at the dumb caption --
Basement japes: Ben Folds Five, from left, Darren Jessee, Robert Sledge, and
Ben Folds. But are where are the other two?
(Is it just me or is there a green-ish looking stain on Darren's pants?)
Then I turn to the back cover with Sean Landers "writing," ahem, his column
"Genius Lessons." Ha! BIG MISTAKE....
Warning: profanities, obscenities, and generally stupid comments follow
#25 "Pep Talk"
I don't know much about music. All I ask is to be able to turn on my radio
when I paint my paintings and hear something halfway decent, but now in the
late nineties that simple act is virtually impossible. With shit bands like
BEN FOLDS FIVE, Sugar Ray, Matchbox 20, and Third Eye Blind clogging play
lists how the am I supposed to make good art? I'm not asking for much, just a
semi-original sound, good lyrics, and a few tear jerking ballads per album.
Okay so I like the chick songs on an album what's wrong with that? I do my
best work when the ballads are on. Look, I need music to motivate me and bands
like BEN FOLDS FIVE motivate me to turn off my radio, to break my radio, to
puke on my radio but not to listen to my radio and definitely not to paint.
Hey rock wannabes, you have a void to fill. There is real money to be made
here, labels are promoting ass wipes when they could be promoting you.
That's right, you could be the next giant of rock and you will be if you
simply take my advice. #1, limit you masturbation, build up a good load of
cheese, it helps creativity. #2 Don't smoke as much drop as you normally do,
it makes you paranoid which can be usedfuul in an oomagooma sort of way, but
ultimately makes you lazy and suck in a Greatful Dead sort of way. [Who's
grateful that old goat is dead, I am that's who] Use crank if you have to do
drugs, at least you'll get things done. #3, fall in love with someone way
better looking than you, then proceed to get dumped on your ass and broken
hearted. You want to be in such mental anguish form this, that if you don't
write a song, you wil blow your brains out. What do you write about? The fact
that you got dumped you dumb ass, and don't skimp on the melodrama, that's the
stuff that puts you on the charts, but don't be pathetic either or
you'll be BEN FOLDS SIX........etc.
This nice little article goes on and on and on.
Well, he's right, you know.
He doesn't know or care much about music.
He can't even draw very well.
He can't even write very well.
He can't...even...spell..correctly.
......................................................................
Don't forget to send hate mail to Spin Magazine:
Write Going Postal:
6 West 18th Street
New York, NY 100011
or email:
spinonline@aol.com
Always include your full name and phone number for verification. Letters may
be edited for length and clarity.
Of course, the better your write your letter, the better your rage will be
expressed clearly. This Landers fellow obviously has not done any of his
homework and only shows his incompetence by off-handedly mentioning the bands
included in his blatant laundry list of so-called "one-hit" wonders. I wonder
if the song he repeatedly suggests is "pathetic" is in fact Brick, because is
he ever caught a whiff of Song For the Dumped the word "pathetic" would,
I believe, be ripped from his vocabulary permanently. Of course, it doesn't
take much to see through his fake "I don't care about music even though I
write for a music magazine" attitude; we all know that it is a pointed attempt
to induce a letter-writing frenzy. (Note the joy that the magazine expressed
at the volume of mail received after Landers' column about his contract
renewal.) As I see it we have four options here:
1. Write the longest, most rambling, incessantly hateful letters to Sean
Landers and Spin
2. Write stupid little pointless emails saying "You f--king suck!" as they
truly desire
3. IGNORE the ignoramus.
4. Be like me and send tapes of Ben Folds Five songs especially Song for the
Dumped and Brick, with no return address except for the words: "From One Angry
Dwarf."
~Kathryn
..............................................................................
..
"Howard, The Strangest Things have happened lately..."
THE STRANGEST THINGS
http://members.xoom.com/HndOfChaos
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 07 May 1998 22:31:15 -0400
From: Jessica Brandt <jbrandt@kent.edu>
Subject: Pay for tapes? yeah right!
GOATMAN SAID:
>first email me, so i know about the trade, ill give you my adress and
>everything then. then, send me a 120 minute tape, plus shipping and a $10
>tip for me (since i cant "sell" the tape... we'll call it a "tip"). if
>this is a bit steep for you, ill take your best offer. I WILL ALSO TRADE
>bootlegs or anything bff related. Ill copy and send the tape within 1 day
>that i receive it. Email me-- goatman1@geocities.com -- if you have any
>questions or if you wanna trade.
I don't mean to bash anyone on this lovely mailing list, and i am NOT
trying to "toot my own horn" but this is just a little "tip" of my own:
Any of you non-traders out there, please be aware that you can find much
better videos than this (with tons more, rarer stuff) for simply the cost
of S&H and a blank tape, or 2 blank audios, or other stuff. Most traders
who are BFF traders are really nice and will help out a newbie or make a
clean trade with a "vet". PLEASE DON'T PAY $10 FOR A VIDEO! he "goatman"
were offering to pay for postage and the blank, in return for the exact
cost (around $7), it'd be different. a "tip" is the same thing as you
paying for a bootleg, which is not only a taper's disgrace, but it's also
illegal.
I hope some other traders here will back me up.
Also, please don't send me a million requests for video trades. I'll do
them, yes, but be reasonable....
Anyway, if you think that this is a fine deal, be your own judge and go for
it. If you think i'm outta line, well, you know the address, BRING IT ON!
jess
****************************************************************
I'm not just naked, I'm Naked for Jesus!!!
* --+-Read The Shrubbery-+-- *
http://www.theshrubbery.prohosting.com
--New Every Month- -Humor, News and More--
* Ben Folds Five International Fans Page *
http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Backstage/6814/fans.html
--Get a "Ben" Pal- -Now Spans 11 Countries--
* Cousin Jess's World Wide Mess *
http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Backstage/6814
--Tape Trading- Way Cool Links- Literary Madness--
*****************************************************************
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 22:52:52 EDT
From: Zyah <Zyah@aol.com>
Subject: Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #979
- --Jason--
That little comment actually made me laugh. :) I know what you mean. I have
had one too many heads of gelled hair shoved into my mouth...not fun, but I
guess it's part of the experience. ?
You know you said you're doing an essay on 'brickheads," Dan? Well, I don't
know if this is if any interest/importance to it, but I liked BF5 before Brick
and Naked Baby Photos and everything; the song only prompted me to search out
other fans, like through this digest. know what i mean?
- --corinne--
cool, how did you get tickets to a private screening?
- --Dash--
<Does anyone know if the decision to release and therefore censor was made by
the band, the management, the record company or the radio stations?>
I'm almost positive that it's the radio stations who do it. Damn them all! :)
Hey Duncan, I haven't been to 5 concerts either...That should change soon now,
I get my license in a few monthes. :)
Well, for some reason, the first thing I ever posted just showed up in #981.
That's weird. Any1 going to the Y100 FEZtival, maybe I will see you there.
Maybe I'll see you there, but neither of us will be aware that we actually
might know each other through this thing. weird thought.
- --Shan--
<whoever it was that said they listen to harvey danger and asked if anyone
else does...in response to that, yes i do...i just bought their cd like two
weeks ago, i love it! now that would be an awesome concert...definitely some
mosh pits there :)>
Yeah, that would be me, I think. I have it on now, actually! Carlotta Valdez
and Jack the Lion, i think, are my favorites. BTW, Spin sucks! They pick
like 5 artists and have 10 articles on them and only them throughout the whole
magazine. I hate that---no diversity in there at all! They can't even take
the time to label pictures right (does stephan jenkins look ANYTHING like that
guy? No!)
Lauren "baby i'm beat up & broken down...every man knows your name in
this whole damn town" (some g. love for ya)
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 22:58:01 EDT
From: Zyah <Zyah@aol.com>
Subject: Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #984
brian
I like OLP, see them in concert? I could have, but i couldnt go :(
That's all,
Lauren
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 May 1998 22:19:22 -0400
From: chriscummins@juno.com (Chris M Cummins)
Subject: Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #983
Hello
Well, here is my official message about looking for BFF boots. I have a
few audio and video, but I have a ton of stuff by Barenaked Ladies, The
Ocean Blue, James, and E/eels. Just email me and maybe we can work out a
trade.
Thanks everyone.
Chris
------------------------------
End of Magical Armchair Digest V1 #985
**************************************
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