THE MAGICAL ARMCHAIR
The Ben Folds Five Digest
Issue #1040 - June 5, 1998
Magical Armchair Digest Friday, June 5 1998 Volume 01 : Number 1040
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TOPICS IN THIS DIGEST:
wow hostile...hmm
I am offended
'cheesy little college radio station'
a little sensitivity, please
subscribe
Be forewarned, if you have a life you can skip this.
New Kid on the Block
Count, cut, cock, slut
CUT THAT SHIT
Hear this, jackson
Run It Up The Flagpole
STUFF YOU WANT TO READ :)
I'm stupid, sue me :)
Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #1037
HUH???? yeah it's me again, annoying, eh? :)
Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #1038
Giants Stadium and Song Similarity
preeeeeesenting.......
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Wed, 3 Jun 1998 20:19:19 EDT
From: KamalaICB@aol.com
Subject: wow hostile...hmm
well, i'm not one to usually speak up on these kinds of issues...but here i go
just because people are new to the list, they may not be new to the
band........
please keep that in mind
thank you and good nite
casey girl
------------------------------
Date: Wed, 3 Jun 1998 21:41:20 EDT
From: LastPolka1@aol.com
Subject: I am offended
This is crazy and I am offended. I can not believe the way all of these so
called, "better", "senior" armchair members are acting. I'm sure I stand with
many others on the list when I say how excited and privileged I feel now that
these awesome senior armchair members have chosen to grace us with their
precense for the month of June. (Note Sarcasm)
My "Best Imitation" of one of these people:
"Hi I am awesome cause I was on the list forever. And I hate when people clog
the armchair with crap but hey im doing it now!" Am I seeing some
hypocracy??!?!?
I dont mean to be rude or anything, but this is ridiculous. I am just as big
a ben-fan as y'all are. And, i probably would have been on the armchair for
the past 2.5 years had I had an online service. But this so isn't the point.
I find myself sitting here rereading every post I send to the armchair like 30
times because i dont want to offend someone or clog up this precious armchair
space.
I am dreadfully sorry for wasting space but I figured since y'all do it, I
might as well too.
Thank you for your time.... I would appreciate any feedback
Suzanne
------------------------------
Date: Wed, 3 Jun 1998 21:55:13 +0000
From: "Phillip Yip" <pyip1@umbc.edu>
Subject: 'cheesy little college radio station'
> I actually saw the guys the day BEFORE the feztival. I saw on their
> website that they were going to be in Philly for a private concert
> for a cheesy little college radio station, so i wrote the station
> for passes, and they said no, so i said "fuck you, I'm going anyway"
> As if they could stop me from seeing my boys!
Cheesy little college radio station? If you asked me, 88.5 WXPN is
the best radio station on the planet. Sure it lacks all the
commercials and the hype, but.. oh wait, that's what I like in a
station! Plus, they've been playing BFF and lots of other good music
for a long time now. I mean, just today, they played Alice Childress.
What kind of cheesy little college radio station would get the boys
in for a little private session anyway?
Phil
Phillip Yip - pyip1@umbc.edu - cherub23@usa.net
http://www.gl.umbc.edu/~pyip1
"we're gonna rise above the things that we lack...
good vibrations that we make will come bouncing back"
- -morcheeba
------------------------------
Date: Wed, 3 Jun 1998 22:02:45 EDT
From: Dramatics@aol.com
Subject: a little sensitivity, please
Now, I know we all get into our share of arguments and fights on the
armchair, and personally, I think that's what makes it interesting. But I
have to object to FHudetz@aol.com usage of "little half-fag." Now, part of me
hopes to god that was said with the intent of being sarcastic, and that
FHudetz doesn't really call people names like that. But unfortunately, there
are enough rude and ignorant people in the world who really do see the world
through homophobic glasses.
I hate censorship, but I hate homophobia even more. Can we PLEASE refrain
from using such phrases on the Armchair? I don't care if you say it jokingly
or if you mean it - it doesn't belong here, and I don't think the rest of us
need to put up with it. I know I'm not going to tolerate it. The "heated
discussions" aren't going to make me leave, but offensive comments will.
Thanks.
- --LCK
------------------------------
Date: Wed, 3 Jun 1998 22:09:19 EDT
From: Pawn12@aol.com
Subject: subscribe
subscribe
------------------------------
Date: Wed, 3 Jun 1998 22:23:40 EDT
From: ETS83@aol.com
Subject: Be forewarned, if you have a life you can skip this.
A lot of crap is gonna be covered here so if you have no time or any sort of
a life skip it because you can.
1. Stop complaining about people at concerts moshing or crowd surfing.
Anyone that does that is to stupid to be on the list so you don't need to tell
people that aren't here to stop. And if anyone here is stupid enough to do
that, well then this isn't the list I thought it was...
2. Air, for some reason I can't help but see Ben as a child swimming in a
large body of water in the middle of the night and pulling in a drowning
person, but the theory about the coma works until he says he pulled him in and
he wasn't breathing. The idea about the 12 guys swimming is good, but he was
spinning towards the moon light not a cave ceiling, then again I could just be
really anal retentive when it comes to details in lyrics and should just shut
the hell up...
3. If you are putting quotes in a year book and care about what other people
from your HS think you have some big problems.
4. The cover of the self titled, looks like something from a Holloween
costume contest. Robert is definitely on the right and it looks the person on
the left is in a black dress with big streamer like things on the cuffs. The
person in the middle is super deformed and sitting in a trash can. This is my
idea and is wrong already just because it is my idea.
5. If anyone lives between or in the vicinity of Reno and San Fran and you
want/need a ride to Lilith Fair on the 23rd E-mail me and we can negotiate.
6. Your requests for tolerance will no longer be tolerated.
7. I feel privileged to be a part of the home coming of all the old MA
members. This will be up there with the time I took 5,000 acid hits in my
right eye and talked to god.
I don't have anything else to comment on now so I will do all the promos and
stop taking up space.
Go to my page, it has stuff on it that sucks:
http://members.aol.com/ETS83/index.html
In my CD player:
BFF: all three CD's and the 2 Kate singles.
King Missile: Mystical Shit, Happy Hour.
Weezer: Pinkerton
------------------------------
Date: Wed, 3 Jun 1998 22:23:17 EDT
From: Rose123300@aol.com
Subject: New Kid on the Block
Hey everyone! My name is Rose and I just recently joined the Magical Armchair
community. Last night I went to the Pine Knob show as well as some of the
other people I've read submitions from. I went with two of my friends who are
also Ben Folds Five fanatics (I got them into BFF :) and on our way to the
concert (we left REALLY EARLY) Well, we were listening to my favorite radio
station (105.1 The Edge, they usually play good music) and first they did an
interview with Beck, which really got us psyched up, and then later they did
one with Ben and Darren (I have no idea where Robert was, I missed him!) Just
as we were pulling into the parking lot on the west wing, they JUST finished
their interview with the station's DJ (they happened to be broadcasting at the
concert) and we saw them sooooo close! I know, I'm pathetic because it's not
like we even chased their golf cart, which we had two chances to do, but my
friends and I were too shy, I guess. It's really depressing thinking about
missing my chance to meet them, even though they're regular people, but I
wanted to get my cd booklet signed :( But the cool part was that I at least
saw them UP CLOSE. Saw Ben's girlfriend too, she and he sat in the back of the
cart while Darren whisked them away.... how sweet. Well, I'm sorry if this
bores anyone, maybe I got carried away. I'm new to this though, so give me a
break, I need one on occaison. Well, bye!!!
Rose
------------------------------
Date: Wed, 3 Jun 1998 22:47:03 EDT
From: Brad654@aol.com
Subject: Count, cut, cock, slut
In a message dated 98-06-03 20:19:30 EDT, you write:
> It's just
> like on S/T when we hear "Count that bitch off somebody!"
> So, that's the damn deal about that.
I always thought it was "Cut that bitch off, somebody-- it's screamin'," as in
"turn that amp off, it's really loud," or something like that.
Jesus, we are a bunch of obsessed people.
Brad
------------------------------
Date: Wed, 3 Jun 1998 23:29:10 -0400
From: schander@juno.com (joe s schanderson)
Subject: CUT THAT SHIT
Don't worry, even I realize how pathetic it is that we're discussing what
"studio babble" is actually being said, but this is what is said. I am
not pretty sure or guessing...this is what is being said at the end of
BRICK
Robert: I hope we got that on tape cuz it......
Ben: Is someone saying something
Robert: It was really.....
Darren: I don't know
Ben: I think I hear some kind of noise
Robert: I was thinking......
Ben: cut that shit
Robert: I was thinking about respecting the work.....
Ben: shut the @%%$ up
Darren: ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR
I'm not actually sure if the Darren voice is Darren, I might have those
two mixed up, or could be Caleb even but anyway...........now all is
known
michigan joe
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------------------------------
Date: Wed, 03 Jun 1998 23:34:17 -0400
From: Jessica Brandt <jbrandt@kent.edu>
Subject: Hear this, jackson
Will the real authority on hardcore fans, tolerance, lyrics, and BFF please
stand up and be noticed? This is all bullcrap. Everyone seems to have "my
$.02" or "IMHO" or whatever the hell. "Can't YOU all just get along?" "Why
don't YOU all just shut up?" "Why do YOU all post that stuff?"
Seems like there's too many chiefs and not enough Indians (to be
politically incorrect).
If you post something flammable, expect to get flamed.
Listen to "YOUR elders", they are smarter than you.
This is the internet, not real life. Real life has real people and real
friends and real boring music. In real life, nobody likes YOU.
take this pillar of salt, you will need it in order to read this digest.
Robert will be on springer June 31st. Check your local listings.
Jess
****************************************************************
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http://www.theshrubbery.prohosting.com
--New Every Month- -Humor, News and More--
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http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Backstage/6814/fans.html
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--Tape Trading- Way Cool Links- Literary Madness--
*****************************************************************
------------------------------
Date: Wed, 03 Jun 1998 23:04:16 -0500
From: rh@apci.net
Subject: Run It Up The Flagpole
Geez, if any more of you GAGs or grand-attitude-guys ("I've been on the
Armchair before but left because I'm too fucking intelligent for this
shit") come crawlin' back to mama... well, I just don't know what to
think... my oh my. Yeah, it's true... in my post yesterday I said
"welcome back". But that was then. Now I'm not so sure I wasn't a
little hasty w/that welcome back stuff. If I read one more, grade A
bullshit post from the over-inflated egos of the pseudo
"creme-de-la-creme" gang you won't have to put up w/me on the list
because I will have gagged to death.
Here's a thought for the GAGs... take a hint from Ben Folds. Remember
when he throws the stool at the piano -- as he did so masterfully :) at
the Nashville River Stages performance? My interpretation of the stool
toss is this... don't take things or yourself too seriously -- in this
case a material thing that just happens to make music. Life should be a
kick. My advice: learn from Ben. And as Aaron said check your
ego/attitude at the door... you know, the door that leads to the room
with the Magical Armchair... I believe you said you'd been there
before. Just curious, did you ever get to sit in the chair or were you
too busy attitudinizing? (I'll save you the time of looking it up in
your Funk & Wag... it means to assume an affected attitude/posture).
Meanwhile recalling the Harvey Danger performance last night: "and when
I feel a bit naughty I run it up the flagpole & see who still looks..."
For me it's not a difficult choice really: wanking or reading another
self congratulatory GAG post.
Ray
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 4 Jun 1998 00:10:01 EDT
From: Snowwite67@aol.com
Subject: STUFF YOU WANT TO READ :)
<< i agree fully with lauren. people who follow popular music don't know the
roots of rock. bff is really good in incorporating many things which are
really cool elements. >>
Amen brother man!! Damn, I love it when people agree fully with me! Listen
to some jazz, kids. Billie Holiday, Chet Baker, Ella Fitzgerald, Miles Davis,
Bill Evens Monk...I could go on forever. And if you like pop check out it's
roots by listening to Cole Porter and George Gershwin. Just doing my part to
educate the masses. :)
- -Lauren super music major and therefore thinks she knows EVERYTHING about
music bitch
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 4 Jun 1998 00:12:12 EDT
From: Snowwite67@aol.com
Subject: I'm stupid, sue me :)
<< .you all deserve a cookie. >>
Can you mail me my cookie? I would like it now please. Unless it is an
oatmeal cookie, I don't like those. :)
- -Lauren super bitch
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 4 Jun 1998 00:46:45 EDT
From: BlueJellow@aol.com
Subject: Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #1037
In a message dated 98-06-03 20:43:36 EDT, you write:
<< I introduced myself, asked him what a Bhagavad Gita was (which i had drawn
as
a drink, because it *sounds* like one), and he told me that it was a Hindu
hat, and told me a little about it, and drew me one in my concert notebook,
>>
I think Ben is the funniest person EVER. This girl is going to forever
believe that it is a HINDU HAT!!! That's hilarious. And he drew a picture of
the "hat". Wow, if that isn't humor.......
Lucy
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 4 Jun 1998 00:49:12 EDT
From: Snowwite67@aol.com
Subject: HUH???? yeah it's me again, annoying, eh? :)
<< HA! YOU'RE FLAT OUT, NO DOUBT ABOUT IT WRONG!!!! That was especially
devoted
to LAUREN, Super Bitch!!! >>
Excuse me?? I NEVER said that "Air" was about Godzilla, hon. And I did not
yell at you about Gershwin. I simply informed you because you asked about it.
Let me give you a little advice that might help you in your travels: If you
don't want people to answer you, don't ask a question.
- -Lauren super bitch
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 4 Jun 1998 00:54:39 EDT
From: BlueJellow@aol.com
Subject: Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #1038
In a message dated 98-06-03 20:44:11 EDT, you write:
<< Now, I know I've only been around this spanking gorgeous mailing list a
while, but even my lazy, untrained eye can notice that it could be better. >>
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH.
It's all the same
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 4 Jun 1998 01:15:09 -0400
From: "Leigh Nelson" <leigh13@mindless.com>
Subject: Giants Stadium and Song Similarity
I'm looking for anyone who's going to the DMB/Beck/BFF show on Sunday at
Giants Stadium. I'd like to meet up with some other BFF fans amongst the
(seemingly) millions of Birkenstock-, cargo-short-, plaid-shirt-,
white-hatted-wearing Dave Matthews "fans" I expect to see there. I'm a big
DMB fan myself, but some of those guys I've seen at the last two shows I've
seen....ugh. It'd be cool to dance around a bit and make some noise for our
boys, ya know? So email me if you're going, please.
And whilst we're comparing "Air" to every other song BFF has recorded, can I
ask if I'm the only one who thinks "Video" and "Last Polka" have WAY too
similar intro piano riffs?
Later days,
Leigh (the original)
==============================================================
Leigh13@mindless.com aol:thirteen2k http://www.easysoft-usa.com/13
"I got a different angle like a parallelogram"
==============================================================
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 4 Jun 1998 01:50:15 EDT
From: F2G2@aol.com
Subject: preeeeeesenting.......
me.
okay, so this internet guy/girl/thing named quinnt sent me a missive, along
with many of my fellow rf-ers. leading with the heading of "june is smart
month on the armchair." so he told us how we were inordinately smart, and how
we should return to the ma(mostly atavistic) to breathe fresh air and wisdom
into it.
he also said something about how dull you all were.
anyhow......
flattery does get results, and the resurgence of our old skool little crew
shows this.
so.....for those of you who don't recognize me (uh.......newbies), my name is
matthew. yes, you might detect a chip on my shoulder.
i have been a fan since that night so long ago in winston-salem when mes amis
paul and troy said, "we're going to see this supposedly cool band at ziggy's.
want to go?"
(yes, it was the infamous 'who the fuck are you' night that has been
immortalized in such glorious fashion.) i've since racked up 9 shows, been to
the first conBENtion, met the guys a coupla times and......
whatever. that's my resume.
left the armchair some time ago, when it seemed that the popularity of brick
was making the fanbase analogous to that of matchbox 20. whom i loathe.
welcome to the mainstream......
now, for a long time i was giddy as a schoolgirl over the boys and their
music. i am not a fickle music listener, nor do i consider myself lacking in
taste.
i believe i taste like fruit-stripe gum, but with longer lasting flavor.
but now, i feel bf5's getting tired. redundant, even. show 9 was as poor a
show as i've seen the boys do.....beck was bitchin though. and sean lennon's
pretty cool.
redundant, redundant, redundant. shall i say it one more time?
the early 99 release of official album 3 should decide it for me.
but til then, i hope to be the devil's advocate. (provided i stay long enough
at this fanletter that's already been proven once to be weak.)
and maybe, if you listen carefully, you'll learn something.
redundant.
matthew
------------------------------
End of Magical Armchair Digest V1 #1040
***************************************
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