THE MAGICAL ARMCHAIR
The Ben Folds Five Digest
Issue #1053 - June 9, 1998
Magical Armchair Digest Tuesday, June 9 1998 Volume 01 : Number 1053
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TOPICS IN THIS DIGEST:
We Are Family..
100% complaint free
SHUT THE HELL UP SO I CAN REPRESENT
For those of y'all that are Canadian Fans....
blah blah blah
Meaning Crap and Drivel Designed to be Painless (Unlike Other Posts)
Sunday's show
mp3's for the rest of us...
lol@vito
Re: Old Mail
penis
Sydney show: 27/6/98
The Five - perhaps a little tired of touring?
Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #1049
GIANTS Stadium - What can I Say?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Sun, 7 Jun 1998 21:34:30 EDT
From: Emmaline20@aol.com
Subject: We Are Family..
I'm sitting in front of my computer completely dumfounded as to how to start
this particular posting (2nd in three days, although this number is quite less
as a few months ago when it seemed I was just all over the place :) )
So...I"ll cut to the chase and save you all some precious seconds of your
lives (my friend once downloaded the screensaver that had a running countdown
of how many seconds he had left to live, but he deleted it because it was so
depressing) How many of you heard our leaders (sometimes I feel as though I'm
in a cult) on The Edge with Tom Calderone last Sunday? Well, despite crummy
weather (we're talking hail, rain, lightening, thunder, and tornados, well,
just funnel clouds), I braved the elements and taped it. About fifteen
minutes, mainly music (SFTD, Brick, BOWCCL, and Kate), a little talking
(mostly Darren which was somewhat of a pleasant surprise). Ben did say
something rather amusing about critics he had talked to...it was something to
the effect that these critics would be like 'I gave WAEA a B or a few stars"
and Ben was basically like "Well, I kept listening to it and listening to it
(WAEA) and I realized it was better than that, I'm sorry." So um
yeah....that's my post.
Sarah :)
PS. I think perhaps in my last post I mentioned how I would like to someday be
remembered on this thing by people (considering I've lurked for the majority
of 2 1/2 years) And some girl emailed me with information regarding my post
and she remembered me as "the girl who got the piano stool at the Hammerstein
show." My quest in life has been fulfilled.
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 07 Jun 1998 21:52:49 -0400
From: cherry@idirect.ca
Subject: 100% complaint free
Does anyone know if they are coming up with something new soon or did I
just hear wrong.
See how easy that was, no compaining what so ever.
One complaint-free post.
Have a nice day/evening/might
Val
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 7 Jun 1998 22:17:18 EDT
From: ETS83@aol.com
Subject: SHUT THE HELL UP SO I CAN REPRESENT
Ok, some people here think we should all grow up and go back to the way the
MA was before. 5,000 people saying that "Yes Ben was playing Gershwin." "Yes,
there is a phone in SLNT." "Yes, Brick is about abortion." I mean god forbid
something a little more constructive goes on. I am sorry I am denying all you
other people from asking questions just by putting things up here, but we have
to remember that as much as you like the digests being the same topics being
pounded into the ground there are also people that want it to have more. I
didn't like the RFer's enterance, but they, in my opinion, have been one of
the best things to affect this list in a long time. I don't really care what
anyone says about this whole thing, it is all one big greed fest just like
life. Oh well.
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 07 Jun 1998 22:26:41 -0400
From: Gregory <ggregory@kingston.net>
Subject: For those of y'all that are Canadian Fans....
Just wondering....
Has anybody seen SFTD being played on Much? For that matter, has anybody
seen any BFF videos other than Brick and BOWCCL on Much? I would kill for
a spotlight right now...wait that's overstating it. But I'd really like to
see one.
Thanks,
Scott
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 7 Jun 1998 22:30:21 EDT
From: KrZy29@aol.com
Subject: blah blah blah
<< if i have to scroll through one more message saying "hey all you 'old
school' fans are dicks," i will urinate on my keybord. >>
Well, i'm a long time fan and fairly new on the list (a couple of months) and
without carrying on a pointless argument all i'm gonna say is...old or new we
are all BFF fans...if we werent would we take the time to read post after
post?? I think not...so lets not get to the point of urinating on our
keyboards ok??
~Kristina
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 7 Jun 1998 22:37:15 EDT
From: HndOfChaos@aol.com
Subject: Meaning Crap and Drivel Designed to be Painless (Unlike Other Posts)
Hey all--
I've have to say that it makes me sad to see all this angry, mad, fist-
fighting, bickering on the list. I don't really like bad-tempered drivel, so I
feel that it is my duty to fill the Armchair with slightly pleasant
meaningless drivel. ::salutes::
LOOK FAMILIAR?:
>ARMCHAIR FAQ
> To help you be a better citizen of the Armchair, Mark Piper has
>compiled a list of Frequently-Asked Questions just for subscribers to the
>Magical Armchair. Please check it out at
>http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/5430/listguide.html There is also a
>link at the Magical Archive homepage, http://oeonline.com/bff/list/
The reason I ask this is because we seem to have violated one of the
commandments, as in Thou shalt not bring up the subject of old vs. new fans.
(Gasp!)
FHudetz@aol.com WROTE THIS:
>RF (Redundant Fuck)
Hey that's hilarious....wait....I'm *on* the Rockford Files. Damn.
THIS POST ROCKS:
>How much does everyone just love short posts?
>
>@
I do. Love short posts, I mean. Just my .02 cents (I only consider myself
worthy of 2/100ths of a cent in thought.
ABOUT RESPECT: Um, exactly how *does* one have sexual intercourse on a piano?
Ben has a baby grand, right? Would that be large enough? Lid down? or not? Do
I get to hold down the sustain pedal???? :) Just kidding.
TOM & MARY: Just wondering if anyone else took "fabricated extra parts" to
mean, instead of the action of frabicating extra parts to the secret, that the
people in question actually *have* "fabricated" extra parts, using fabricated
as an adjective.
JERRY SPRINGER: You guys just HAD to get my hopes up. I almost rushed out an
grabbed an extra blank videotape and the remote until I realized that there
was no (S)March 31. And I'm *on* on the Rockford Files. (Doh!) :( Although I
really would like to see the match-up of...say...Mariah Carey and the esteemed
Robert Sledge on Celebrity Deathmatch. Ye-ah!!
TO THE GUYS WHO POSTED THAT ONE FORWARD ABOUT $1000: But what if I *DON'T
WANT* Windows98, huh? Or make money fast, eh?
DICK HOLSTER: Oh, I get it now! Um....Dick Holster is actually a true-to-life
Dick Tracy, private eye, detective-type guy that...um...lived during the turn
of the century and..like...played rags on the piano...yeah, that's it. Ben is
Dick Holster reincarnated. That's got to be it.....:D
TO EMILY (EMMALINE555@AOL.COM): Are you sure you want to be known as the Ben
Folds's Stool Girl?
THE FUNDAMENTAL DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE RF AND THE MA: It's all in the name!
"Uncle Walter" vs. "Battle of Who Could Care Less"....The two could not
possibly mix peacefully...its all about ideological and philosophical
differences. MA is from Uncle Walter, RF is from Battle.....Quick, someone
call a doctor.......
AND: a cyber-hug to Ssull9397@aol.com for being a BFF fan for so long. (10 yrs
is a lot to me, okay?)
HAVE YOU HAD YOUR BFF QUOTIENT TODAY?:
Read the BFF FAQ. Love the BFF FAQ. Eat the BFF FAQ. Breathe the BFF FAQ.
http://www.globaldialog.com/~sschneid/bff/bff_info.html
(Just please don't hurt Scott, I think he is going to send me sheet
music...someday) :D
APPLICATIONS:
>I just wanted to ask, Where I can get an application to be a pompous,
>self-important, my-shite-don't-stink fan? Sounds pretty kickass to
>me.
Here you go:
Name (3 bonus points if you have the same name as someone in a BFF song):
Address: (2 bonus points if ya live on the corner of Rosemary and Cameron)
Phone Number: (3 extra points if your phone's disconnected and your shit's out
on the lawn)
Today's Date in nanoseconds, rounded off to the nearest pi:
Birthdate: (4 bonus points if you were born in SMarch!)
Age as of today, right now, down to the nearest hour:
Age you were when Ben Folds was born (56 bonus points if converted into weeks,
days, hours, minutes and seconds:
Age you were when the self-titled album was released (7 bonus points if you
have the Japanese version, 3 bonus points if you actually own this album):
Age you were when WAEA was released (34 bonus points if you have the
"Fjordian" version, 19 bonus points if you have the version with the hidden
track, 19 bonus points if you don't, 19 points if you actually have WAEA):
Age you were when NBP was released (2,411,315 bonus points if you have the
Argentinian version):
Number of times you tried to destroy your stereo after you heard Brick on the
radio one too many times (15 bonus points if you were sucssessful in doing so
and bought a shabby clock-radio to replace it):
Number of CDs, singles, soundtracks, etc. you own, having to do with BFF (100
bonus points if you have the One-Hit-Wonders Compilation that has "Video
Killed the Radio Star):
Number of items of BFF paraphenlia that you own (67 extra points for each T-
shirt you made yourself):
Number of times that you had to replace a BFF item because you broke it (1234
extra points if it was WAEA with the extra track):
999 extra points if you are Steven, it is your last night in town, and the
phone just rang.
There you are. If you have between 0 and 100,000,000 points you are a bona-
fide-my-shyte-don't-stink BFF fan. Oops, I forgot pompous.
**This post was not meant to insult any singular one person, but rather, if
you were insulted then my guess would be that other people were too. My tip
would be to go find them and get some new friends. :) **
~Kathryn
THE STRANGEST THINGS
"Howard, the strangest things have happened lately..."
http://members.xoom.com/HndOfChaos
``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
```
P.S. Mr. Frank Maynard, I do, like many others, realize that this mailing list
had become a bit tedious and unpleasant of late, and I, as a fellow
Armchairian, do pledge to do my best to relieve this. Thank you for continuing
the Magical Armchair, because it would not be possible without people like
you, father of the list. I am eternally grateful, so please don't stop
whatever it is that you have been doing to keep this going. Anyway, thanks for
listening....
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 7 Jun 1998 22:40:38 EDT
From: Zyah@aol.com
Subject: Sunday's show
Look at this--a post entirely on BFF! Aren't I talented. Nah, I'm kidding.
:) I like the NBFF stuff sometimes, when it's interesting.
Anyway...
Regretfully, I couldn't go to the BFF/DMB/Beck show up in NJ somewhere
tonight..Plus, I wouldn't have wanted to go with the people I would have gone
with because they'd just be going for DMB..I mean, nothing wrong w/that, I
just like Beck & BF5. Anyway, I'm going to get the full report from my friend
tomorrow...Well, I won't *post* the whole report, because I know you guys hate
that! Only the good parts. :)
Any of you go to it, btw?
I guess that's it for me,
Lauren
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 07 Jun 1998 19:47:36 PDT
From: "Michael Della Bitta" <neptunelizard@hotmail.com>
Subject: mp3's for the rest of us...
i too have been searching for mp3's, and i always came up with a lot of
hits for Scour sites. unfortunately, they use a proprietary download
format that requires a client program that is written only for windows
machines (which is UNFAIR, g'damnit, 'cause i said so!), and i use a
macintosh. so those files are pretty much lost on me. this, however, has
several rarer ones:
http://php.indiana.edu/~wsarles/bffmp3.html
which is cool because if i find another site that only has brick, i'm
going to take a dump right where i sit, and my computer isn't in the
bathroom (although that'd be an efficent way to get two things done at
once, no?) the only problem is that this site is on a really sketchy
server that cuts off your downloads after about 30 sec. into the song,
so you need to download this OTHER download client that lets you resume
downloads where you got cut off for whatever reason called 'getright.'
there's a windows version but no mac-specific version, but there's a
java version that works for me. happy hunting!
michael
- ----------------------------------------------
"so what are you going to do, get us with your skeleton power?"
- chief wiggum
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Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 07 Jun 1998 19:48:37 PDT
From: "Ashley Hill" <hc_mercury@hotmail.com>
Subject: lol@vito
dont you realize that you just did the same thing?
______________________________________________________
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------------------------------
Date: Sun, 7 Jun 1998 22:49:49 -0400 (EDT)
From: echap@netcom.ca
Subject: Re: Old Mail
Hey-
Sorry to post without Bentent (see, it's catching on!), but if anyone on here has Emailed me in the past week, please resend it or give me the gist of it, since my computer is out to get me...
Robbie C.
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 07 Jun 1998 20:46:31 PDT
From: "Chandra Hicks" <chanfifteen@hotmail.com>
Subject: penis
>I apologize for all the bitchy stuff I've been saying. I realize what
a dork
>I am. I have a quote for ya.
>"I'm a dork"--Jennifer Hewitt (that's the most hilarious thing I've
ever
>heard)
did you know that 'dork' actually means penis? so when you say "i'm a
dork" you're actually saying "i'm a penis" this isn't meant to be a
criticism, just a fun fact (smile)
chandra
______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 7 Jun 1998 21:10:19 -0700 (PDT)
From: Jordan Wightman <tuo2@rocketmail.com>
Subject: Sydney show: 27/6/98
hey,
the tickets for the Sydney show at the enmore theatre
on the 27/6 go on sale from ticketek (ph. 9266 4800)
and the enmore (ph. 955 0366) on the June the 15th.
Snout are the opening band.
Now asking for a favor. What the hell is G.A. seating?
sorry to sound stupid in advance.
Anyone making a list of armchair people who are going?
if not i will.
Mail me if so.
Jordan
_________________________________________________________
DO YOU YAHOO!?
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------------------------------
Date: Mon, 8 Jun 1998 00:51:22 EDT
From: SouperDv@aol.com
Subject: The Five - perhaps a little tired of touring?
Hey, after 3 years of non-stop touring, I think the guys need a break, thats
why the enthusiasm probably hasnt been there at shows recently, y'know? And
I'm sure all these moshing morons dont help either. After they get done over
seas, they'll come home this fall and cut a new album - take a little time off
to write, then they'll be back with a vengeance I'm sure. I hope the guys do
pull out all the stops in Atlanta - cause I'll be there. (ok thats a little
selfish)
Thats just my two cents.
In my CD player
Ben Folds, Ben Folds, Ben Folds
"...but I started drifting around the part about me acting my age.."
BFF
SUPERDAVE(!)
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 8 Jun 1998 01:01:36 -0400
From: "Paperscratcher" <coyotearm@email.msn.com>
Subject: Re: Magical Armchair Digest V1 #1049
God!! you know how you can tell that not only a band, But an album is good?
when you have A song of the month/week/or day.when I first listened to BF5's
"whatever, never..." my favorite was battle for it was the song that got me
to purchase the album. After that it was Evaporated, which still breaks my
heart every time I hear it. I got so excited over the band that I made the
Leap to their self Titled Release, where I imediately fell in love with
"Video" just for the last verse about "whatever it was we had then in
common, grew up and left home" I fukin cried like a baby after that. Then I
went back to "Whatever" and was in shock about "selfless, cold and composed"
. after that I lost fucking track. If that isn't a sign of a good band then
I don't know what is.
these days It is definately "The Last Polka" not only does the song capture
the absolute crumbling of a relationship, but it describes with ridiculous
detail the last words between a couple. Man that song is so Powerful. By the
way I Love the list, and theres nothing like recieving head by a mouth full
of altoids.(where did that come from? did I write that?) sorry bout that.
The words you say never seem to live up to the ones inside your head
The Lives we make never seem to ever get us anywhere but dead - Chris
Cornell
- -Paperscratcher
------------------------------
Date: Mon, 8 Jun 1998 01:18:04 -0400
From: "Leigh Nelson" <leigh13@mindless.com>
Subject: GIANTS Stadium - What can I Say?
Now that's it's over what is there to say about tonight's show at Giants
Stadium with Beck and Dave Matthews Band? First off, major negative points
to the concert organizers for sending BFF on at 6pm sharp, when all of maybe
5,000 people were there. Mind you, 5,000 is BIG for a BFF show, but when
you're talking Giants Stadium...it was EMPTY. Since they came on so early,
I missed the opening (chances are it was Dr Pyser) but I still held my own
in good old Section 113. I swear of all the people in the lower tier I was
the only one standing who wasn't on the way to my seat. But I rocked,
danced, and sang loudly, and no one complained. I think all the DMB fans
got a kick out of someone going crazy for these guys known as the Five. The
crowd picked up a bit once they played Brick and for the closer, Song For
The Dumped. Strangely enough, Ben told the story behind Brick before they
played it...I thought it odd because it didn't seem like a very intimate
place to tell it. But I did think it was great that they played Emaline in
the spot where they usually do Selfless, Cold and Composed. If anyone was
listening they may have actually gotten up and danced...I know I was.
Beck was really cool, and Dave Matthews Band was better, assisted greatly by
Mr. Bela Fleck on banjo. It was a great mood for a show--under the stars on
a cool night. You could almost forget that you were in New Jersey. But
alas, it was in NJ, and BFF played only 8 or 9 songs. However, for anyone
who said it would be a disappointment, Ben, Rob, and Darren ROCKED out,
showing that it doesn't matter if it's for 5 or 50 or 50,000 people--they
can play, and they can play hard.
The set (from when I got there): Fair - Battle of Who Could Care Less -
Philosophy - Emaline - Stevens Last Night In Town - Brick - One Angry
Dwarf - Song For The Dumped
Closing in NJ,
Leigh (the Armchair's first)
==============================================================
Leigh13@mindless.com aol:thirteen2k http://www.easysoft-usa.com/13
"seems that further from town I go, the more I hate this place"
==============================================================
------------------------------
End of Magical Armchair Digest V1 #1053
***************************************
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